Deep Down Inside
posted by Corey
About a month ago, I took my cat, Mr. Bojangles, to the vet to check out some sores on his chin and around his ears. It turns out that he had a mild case of feline acne. Who knew there was such a thing! His skin has cleared up almost entirely since then, thanks to very frequent washing of his food bowls and some regular “baths” with medicated kitty-wipes.
My friend Conrad suggested that this feline acne story would make for a good song, so I originally wrote these lyrics with Mr. Bojangles in mind, but then I decided to make the song about a human being instead (because I don’t think cats suffer from hypochondria). I might change it back, though…
Some of the inspiration for this song also came from this article and others like it. As if acne sufferers don’t feel bad enough, apparently it’s constructive to convince them that their unfortunate blemishes are the result of some vague but significant imbalance deep within!
The instruments in this song are piccolo, bass clarinet, drum set, piano, and ‘cello. My biggest concerns have to do with the vocal lines. I’m now so used to singing them that I can’t tell if they’re too bizarre and off-kilter (in a bad way). Let me know if the vocal line flows (or doesn’t flow) for you. And, of course, all other kinds of feedback are also welcome.
“Deep Down Inside”
Audio has been removed.
Download Score [NOTE: PDFs have been temporarily removed. Revised scores will soon be available through New Amsterdam Records.]
It’s not merely an inflammation
Under my skin
Acne isn’t
That simple
My adorable pimples
Are manifestations
Of complications deep within
Complications deep within
You know I’ve tried
Every antibiotic
Searched far and wide
In every idiotic
Self-help guide
But it doesn’t matter how many gallons
Of Benzoyl Peroxide
I’ve applied
There will always be an imbalance
Deep down inside
Tetracycline may temporarily
Clear up my face
But my problem is based
Primarily on the flood
Of toxic waste in my blood
I’ve tried
Every antibiotic
Searched far and wide
In every idiotic
Self-help guide
I’ve tried
Every antibiotic
Searched far and wide
In every idiotic
Self-help guide
But it doesn’t matter how many gallons
Of Benzoyl Peroxide
I’ve applied
There will always be an imbalance
Deep down inside
I think this song is completely wonderful! I’ve listened to it a few times and it’s kind of addictive. The vocal lines all sounded great to me. And I love the subject.
Corey replies: Thanks, Molly!
Hey Corey,
This is the first of set I’m getting to listen to, and I like it. I particularly enjoy the change in rhythmic feel between the verses and the chorus. And those breaks into 3/8 in the chorus are a really nice technique.
I wonder if the insistence that the chorus develops explains some of your doubts about the ending. The rit. abruptly defuses the nervousness of the rhythm, but the lyrics suggest that there’s no quick fix for the problem. Could be a nice tension there, but I’m with Trevor in thinking that there’s something not quite clicking in the current incarnation.
Corey replies: Thanks, Lanier. I really like the 3/8 breaks, if I do say so myself! Yes, I think the ending should probably be changed, but it would also be nice not to end triumphantly.
Cool. What I said about the low C-A M6th in a previous tune goes double for the low C#-A m6th that happens several times here. Just to give you an idea, C#-A and C-Ab m6ths on the bottom strings are my go-to doublestops for sounding as heavy and nasty as possible without clear pitch definition. Obviously it helps that I also play them with great bow pressure and such, but they are naturally very harmonically indistinct.
The E-G-D triple stops are also problematic. Are you wanting the cellist to try to play all three strings simultaneously? I know some books say it can be done, but in my opinion the amount of pressure necessary and its unpredictability mean it should only be used as a special effect. If you want the cellist to roll it, I prefer actually notating it as the two bottom notes (E-G) as grace notes slurred into the top two notes (G-D). That’s kind of a personal peccadillo though.
The vocal line doesn’t bother me at all.
Why piccolo? Are you wanting a thinner sound?
Corey replies: I don’t think the third note in the triple-stop will be missed. Too bad I can’t do my natural-harmonic + artificial harmonic + natural harmonic + artificial harmonic quadruple stop!
At some point I had a reason for choosing piccolo, but now that you mention it… I suppose I could use flute instead. But the piccolo does sort of function as a shadow instrument, so to speak. So maybe the thin sound will work better. Hmm…
Damn fine song. I’ll only kvetch about the last two bars, whose effectiveness at closing things out I’m not entirely sure about.
Also, something that hasn’t bothered me on any one song but I can see as being bothersome when stretched out over a whole suite (so don’t take this as a commentary on this particular song so much as a sort of meta-commentary that had to be put somewhere un-meta), is the way the instruments are used fairly similarly song to song. Strings are arco, lots of woodwind turns, left hand block piano chords, no score directions for tone changes (pont, tasto, &c), things like that.
I know you’re good about thinking about sounds from your signature electro-pop efforts. Just think about like during the NOW Ensemble concert you had at LPR, it was v. effective when Darcy and Nick had their own arrangements, as it colored the overall sound world in a noticeably different and interesting way. Just something to think about.
Corey replies: Definitely something to think about and address. The danger with working in such small nuggets (songs) is that I might lose track of the overall trajectory of the piece. Usually I address this after the songs are all complete, and go back and make revisions, or even drastic changes. I understand the need to treat the humans like humans, not compooooters. Something to address in rehearsals with the players.
And, yes, I was having doubts about the ending of this song. Thanks for mentioning your take on that.
my husband had horrible eczema until he stopped drinking. now his skin is like silk. no toxins = silk. so the “deep down inside” resonates. it’s true what they say about skin.
Corey replies: But drinking is the only way to cope with acne!
i LOVE this tune, but i feel sad for mr. bojangles that he doesn’t have a song now…
Corey replies: Thanks, Bill. Mr. Bojangles has plenty of songs that I sing to him every day. I don’t think he wants a song about his acne out in the world…